Every once in a while over the past year, I’d take out the camera and take one or two photos of something because I felt like I needed to – a birthday, a book cover for a post, or a quick selfie with the baby because he is my last child and once he is grown there ARE NO MORE. But most of the photos weren’t very good because the apathy was just too thick and I didn’t take enough pictures to get a good one.
Can we talk?
So, I always feel a little weird and awkward about this, but I use Google Analytics on my site.
That doesn’t mean I know who you are when you visit me here, but Google does tell me what state or country visitors are from, and which posts people spend the most time on. Analytics came with the blog, and it’s kind of nice to be able to check in on it sometimes and know that I’m not just here talking to myself.
I know that a few people read my book posts, but the ones that get the most action are my sewing posts.
I haven’t finished a sewing project in so long that I can’t remember the last time it happened. There was a magical time leading up to Halloween where I made 6 costumes over the course of a couple of months, but then I totally shut down due to lack of sunlight and did very little after that.
I always tell myself, this is my blog, and I want to write about what I’m doing and what I care about. Even *I* am sick of writing about books, but I don’t have any sewing projects that are ready for prime time.
This past week, I met with a mediation coach to talk about how I can be a better communicator, specifically in regards to my family relationships.
The two-hour virtual meeting was exhausting, but I came away with some new tools to practice. I can’t figure out why we don’t teach these skills to everyone while they’re in school.
I’m seeking out resources to begin honing my listening and conflict resolution skills. I’m bringing the kids along for the ride. They already practice their communication skills on each other every day, and maybe exposure to some new methods will reduce shouting and door slamming.
Have you ever had a period in time where your body wasn’t keeping up with your mind? You had ideas or dreams, but were too tired or unwell to chase them? Oh maybe it’s your mind that’s fatigued by the continual stress of living in the current world.
I’ve been feeling that way lately. My brain is full of inspiration, but I have very little energy to act on it. Some days, regardless of how much energy I have, my brain sad, unmotivated, and stressed.
Usually, slow-paced books make me want to saw my leg off. These books are not so much slow, though, as thoughtful. They make you want to take a breath and re-calibrate.
Last week was really terrible. My response to almost every situation was tears. I was miserable. One day, I went for a walk alone to the library and passed a house that had been decorated for Mardi Gras. Mardi Gras! The green, yellow, and purple decorations were festive and beautiful. Seeing it made me happy.
Over the weekend, things got better gradually. On Sunday night, I went out and bought supplies for Carnival masks. I thought to myself, that was it. I’m over (or through?) the pandemic wall. I’ve done enough grieving about not traveling this year. There’s no school this week. Things are going to be great. I’ll make a short to-do list and be kind to myself about it. I’ll be less stressed because I won’t be doing school with the kids in addition to feeding, supervising, and managing my household. Maybe I’ll want to craft again!
