Archive Self Care - What The Red Herring - Page 16
An Open Letter to Facebook

An Open Letter to Facebook

Dear Mark Z.,

We’ve had a love/hate relationship since our beginning.

But I couldn’t quit you.

I finally got sick of it. You played with FBMessenger functionality to try to force me to get the Messenger app. You made old notifications look like new ones. You made the mobile experience buggy and obnoxious in an attempt to get me to download the app.

I took a break, then decided to get rid of you altogether.

I decided to try Instagram instead. At that time, I didn’t realize you owned them, too.

I started posting pics. And you started pressuring me to use my deactivated FB account to find friends to follow.

I unlinked my FB account. But you know it’s still me, so you keep asking. Not every day, but several times a week. I have been using it for 2 months and already I am considering quitting it, too.

Here’s the thing. There’s the Big Four: Apple, Google, Amazon, and Facebook. My email is through Google. I am typing this on a Mac. And right now, I am not willing to give up the convenience of Amazon. But I CAN quit you right now. I did it once already. It felt really, really good.

What is it they say about love? If you love it, set it free, and if it’s really love it will come back to you?

I turned off my Instagram notifications yesterday.

And you can keep pushing me to connect with my old FB friends through Instagram, and light up that little heart at the bottom of my screen like there is something new when there’s not, but it smacks of desperation, and if you want the truth, you are pushing me away.

Sincerely,

Laura.

Self Defense

Self Defense

Why is it easier to respond graciously to criticism when the person dispensing it isn’t close to us?

The ones who are most qualified to criticize, and do it with our best interest in mind, aren’t those acquaintances and even strangers who feel the need to make known how they feel about us and the way we choose to live. They are our loved ones, and if it isn’t safe for them to speak up when we’re not doing something right, then it might be time to re-examine priorities.

Divorcing Social

Divorcing Social

After I logged out of FB for the last time in mid December, I had a growing feeling that it was for good. I had a few false starts, but the headlines about social media’s role in our culture confirmed what I knew – that FB and I needed to break up for good.

I had it all planned out.

I was going to log in one final time, download my archive, and delete my account. I even did a search ahead of time so I would know what I was doing and wouldn’t have to spend any more time than was necessary on my account.