(Mother’s Day 2017, the first Mother’s Day since I was a mom that I spent away from my kids, except the one I was pregnant with)

I started to write a post about Mother’s Day and how difficult it can be. It occurred to me as I was writing that there was still time to do something about that.

It has been a long debunked myth that men can read minds. Yet I still remain hopeful in certain situations that this will prove to be untrue.

One of those situations is Mother’s Day.

My logical mind understands that what I want on Mother’s Day probably won’t happen if I am not involved in some way. My emotional heart would like for my family to know what I want without me having to say, “This is what I want on Mother’s Day.”

So I’ve given multiple, specific reminders to my kids some years, along with some vague hints for my spouse, and other years hoped my husband remembered to help the kids do something for me.

When the results have been slap dash, or not what I wanted, I’ve felt a little resentful. Then, I feel guilty and unhappy about feeling resentful, because deep down I know what I want is impossible. And I don’t want to do what needs to be done to fix it.

This year, I’m going to try a different approach. I’m going to make a list of my goals for that day, and I am going to GIVE IT to my husband and my big kids ahead of time. I am going to say, “This is what I want for Mother’s Day. Let’s see if you can make it happen!”

And then, I am going to let go.

Here is what is going to be on the list:

1. A Mother’s Day photo of all my kids together where everyone who is capable of following instruction is participating to the best of their ability. Bonus: A photo of me WITH my kids.

2. I don’t have to prepare the meals.

3. Someone else prepares the meals.

4. I receive a perennial potted plant.

5. I receive cards from each of the kids (I’m not looking for anything fancy from the littles; a traced hand or some scribbles is fine).

I will let you know how it goes.